“Honey- do you know what I just realized? Joseph doesn’t say anything in any of the Gospels.”

“That is not correct.”

“Huh?”

“Joseph, at the public naming of Mary’s son, had to pronounce his name to be Jesus.”

Matthew 1:18-24

This is how the birth of Jesus Christ came about. When his mother Mary was betrothed to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found with child through the Holy Spirit. Joseph her husband, since he was a righteous man, yet unwilling to expose her to shame, decided to divorce her quietly. 

The punishment for Mary to be pregnant out of wedlock would have been to be stoned to death. Mary knew this when she answered, “I am the servant of the Lord.” Joseph also knew it when he learned of the pregnancy. However, without his accusation, there would be no trial or execution. Mary’s life- and Jesus’s- is literally in his hands. He is the one who will make the decision as to whether they live or die. In his response, we learn a great deal about the kind of man that Joseph was. Being a “righteous man” means that he followed the Laws of God that were given to Moses and the Israelites at Sinai. He kept Shabbat, he honored his parents, he believed in one God, he kept kosher, he followed the purity law, etc. We know from later Scripture that even though he was poor, he made it a priority to travel with his family to Jerusalem every year for the Passover. But he is also “unwilling to expose her to shame” which means that he is not only righteous in the practice of his faith as it aligns with the spoken words of God, he is also righteous in his actions where mercy must be balanced against the law. Justice according to the Law demands that he accuse Mary of infidelity, send her to trial, and see her executed. Mercy demands that he give her a path to continue living, with the natural consequences of her actions, but without the public shame and trial. How does Joseph respond? He chooses mercy. He has a relationship with the living God. Because of this relationship, he knows that he is called to show the mercy of God, rather than the justice of God. He lets God be the Judge, while he takes the role of Mercy-giver.

Such was his intention when, behold, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream

Matthew 1:16 tells us that Joseph’s father was named Jacob. Joseph would have grown up hearing stories about Jacob, the patriarch, being told by his own father, Jacob. He would have also learned about his own namesake: Jacob’s youngest and most beloved son, Joseph. He would have heard about Joseph, who was sold into slavery by his brothers, traveled to Egypt, and eventually brought salvation and survival to the Israelite people. He would have heard about how Joseph had the gift to interpret dreams, and the impact that gift had. It was Joseph’s ability to interpret dreams that saved his life on several occasions. It was Joseph’s ability to interpret dreams that saved the Israelite people. So, when an angel comes to Joseph in a dream, he understands the potential impact that this dream can have for his family, as well as for his people. After Jesus is born, Herod decrees to kill all of the newborn baby boys. Joseph is warned in a dream to escape to Egypt with Mary and Jesus.God speaks to us in the language that we can understand. Joseph’s language is dreams, like the Joseph of the Old Testament. New Testament Joseph’s language was one that resonated with the foundation and salvation of his people. 
 

and said, “Joseph, son of David, 

The Messiah was prophesied as being of the house of David. In Matthew’s genealogy, we see that Joseph is of the line of David. If the Messiah is to come form the line of David, then he “should be born of Joseph’s spouse into the messianic lineage of David” (Catechism of the Catholic Church 437). But wouldn’t that make Jesus Davidic in name only, not in bloodline? Two interesting points here: Firstly, in ancient Judaism, adoption was a common way that individuals were legally integrated into a family, even after death. For example, let’s take a man who marries, but does not have any children before dying. His brother would marry his wife and have a child with her. That child would then posthumously be adopted by the dead man and receive the honors and rights of being his legal descendant. So Jesus does not need to be biologically Joseph’s son in order to be a descendant of David. He only needs to be adopted by Joseph to take on the mantle of being of the house of David. Secondly, In Numbers 36:6-7, we read “[the daughters] may marry anyone they please, provided they marry into a clan of their ancestral tribe, so that no heritage of the Israelites will pass from one tribe to another, but all the Israelites will retain their own ancestral heritage.” This indicates that the Biblical tradition, if not a commandment, was to marry within one’s tribe. According to this tradition, then, Mary was of the same tribe as Joseph. Since David was of the tribe of Judah, Joseph was also of the tribe of Judah. If Mary married within her tribe, she was also of the tribe of Judah, if not a direct descendant of David. 

do not be afraid to take Mary your wife into your home. For it is through the Holy Spirit that this child has been conceived in her. She will bear a son and you are to name him Jesus, 

To name a child is to claim that child as yours. This may be one reason that families pass down family names- it is a way to claim the child as a member of this specific family. We see this tradition with Zechariah, John the Baptist’s father. The angel, Gabriel, tells Zechariah to name his son John, but others around him protest that it is not a family name. When Joseph names his son, Joseph is claiming responsibility for him as his own. But the act of naming his son is just one component of the responsibility given to Joseph by the angel. The angel specifies the name his son is to be given: Jesus(Latin) or Joshua(Hebrew). Joshua is often translated as “God’s salvation” (see discussion below about the origin of Jesus’ name). Joseph knows what will happen to his son if he names him “God’s salvation.” Joseph knows the prophecies of the messiah. He may not know the details of what is to come, but he knows that it does not end well. Knowing that, Joseph could have given him any one of a thousand other names. He could have named him after his father, Jacob. He could have named him after another patriarch, Abraham, Isaac, Moses, etc. But Joseph did not. Joseph did not claim him as a member of his own earthly family.

Joseph obediently and volitionally gave his son the name that had been given to him by God. He is claiming his son for God’s family. In giving his adopted son the name “Yeshua,” Joseph is giving his fiat to God’s will. With his fiat, Joseph is declaring to God and the world “Thy will be done.” Joseph is making very public the recognition that while his adopted son is his legally, he is truly God’s son. 

because he will save his people from their sins.” 

“Jesus” is a Latin form of the Hebrew name Joshua or Yeheshua, which is often shortened to Yeshua. 

יְהוֹשֻׁעַ

Yehe coming from the name of God given to Moses- commonly written “Yahweh”

Shua meaning “saves”“Yeheshua” is commonly translated as “God saves” or “God’s salvation.”

Who was Joshua? In the Old Testament, Joshua was Moses’s right-hand-man during the Exodus. After Moses died, Joshua was the one who led the Israelites into the Promised Land. Joshua was a leader as well as military strategist. He led the siege of Jericho and delivered the Israelites into the Promised Land, conquering many tribes that had taken possession of Canaan. 

All this took place to fulfill what the Lord had said through the prophet: “Behold, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,” which means “God is with us.” When Joseph awoke, he did as the angel of the Lord had commanded him and took his wife into his home. 

Like Joseph of the Old Testament, Joseph of the gospel takes the message he receives in his dream to heart, recognizing that it was divinely inspired. The words from the angel change his actions dramatically and immediately. He was going to divorce Mary, now he takes her into his home. He was going to leave Mary’s child to grow up with a single mother, now he is going to adopt that child into his own family, giving that child a Davidic heritage.How often do we feel the nudges of the Holy Spirit and respond with such determined action? Are we not more likely to ignore it, because it is inconvenient, or too big a challenge? How many times have you had a dream and then changed your entire life based on it? That is what Joseph did. He heard God’s message to him, in a dream. Then he woke up and got it done- complete life overhaul in one night.

Take it to the kitchen table:

Every time that we say the name “Jesus” we are speaking the one word that we know Joseph spoke. When Joseph said, “his name is Jesus,” he was claiming, “this child is yours, God, but I will do what I can to help prepare him for the mission you have for him.”

As parents, this is our responsibility, too. Our children are not ours. They are God’s. Their lives are not here to fulfill our dreams and aspirations. We have our own lives for that. Our children are here to fulfill God’s dreams and aspirations for them. Our job as parents is to prepare them to do that. Our job is to help them be ready, so that when God calls, they will hear Him, listen to Him and follow Him wherever He leads them.

Make it yours:

God is always speaking to us. The challenge is that we often cannot understand what it is that He is saying. It is like trying to have a conversation with someone speaking a different language. They are speaking, but we are standing dumb-founded and lost. This is how many of us feel with God. The challenge is not to get God to speak to us, because He is doing that already. The challenge is to learn how to understand the messages that He is already sending us.

Challenge 1: Find silence. Turn everything off and find somewhere quiet- yes, your car is an option. Bathroom is another option. Hiding in the broom closet another option. Set a timer for five minutes. Sit in silence for five minutes. Yes, it’s longer than you think. 

Challenge 2: The Talmud, a Jewish collection of oral tradition and teachings, tells us that we should say one hundred blessings a day. A hundred. In the Jewish prayer book, there is a prayer for everything: before you eat, after you eat, washing your hands, seeing a rainbow, using the bathroom, absolutely everything. Set a timer to go off every 1-2 hours. When it goes off, focus on the blessings in your life, the blessings around you now and the blessings that have happened to you today in the past 1-2 hours.

Here are some ideas to get your started:

• You are breathing.
• You can see.
• You can hear.
• You have two legs.
• You can walk.
• You have a house to live in.
• Your digestive tract is working so that you can digest your food and use the restroom.
• You have indoor plumbing for the restroom.

This focus on your blessings will eventually re-train you into the habit of seeing them as blessings as they are happening. 

Challenge 3: The current culture presents children largely in one of two lights: either they are a burden to be avoided at all costs, or they are yours and you can lay your own hopes, dreams, fears and aspirations on them. The truth is neither. The truth is they are God’s children, and you have been given the awesome and terrifying job of preparing them for His mission for them, whatever it is.

Reflect on the following:

• Do I see my children as a burden? Do I sometimes speak as if they are a burden?
• How do I avoid them? Do I give them tablets/ tech to keep them busy so I don’t have to talk to them?
• What dreams of my own do I put onto my children?
• Do I see my children as mine or God’s?
• How does my view of my children impact how I interact with them?
• What skills will my children need to be able to hear God?
• How am I helping them to develop those skills?
• Am I setting a good example of someone who seeks to find God and learn what His mission is for me?

Teach It:

If your children are 4 years old or older, they can learn what the word “unavailable” means.

Here’s how you start: You walk into the living room/ kitchen and say, “I am setting a timer on the oven/ microwave etc. for five minutes. I will be unavailable during that time. That means that I cannot answer questions or solve problems. I will not talk to you and I ask that you not talk to me until the timer goes off, unless you are bleeding profusely or a bone is protruding from your body.” Then you start the timer and walk away. Sit somewhere where the kids can still find you, just in case there is an actual emergency. When a child walks in, which they will, you hold up your hand and say, “I am unavailable. I will be happy to talk to you once the timer goes off.” Yes, it takes some practice. But eventually, your children will understand the concept. Then you can expand this up to 10, then 15, then 20 minutes.

Once the kids understand what being unavailable is, as well as the necessity of having a few minutes of quiet to refocus, recharge and calm down, they can start to use it as well. Have the children sit in the living room, each finding a comfortable place. Set a timer for five minutes. Have everyone sit in silence- yes, silence. Maybe with eyes closed. Once the timer is off, ask each child, “what did God say to you?” This does several things: it shows them that God is speaking, we just need to listen. It also shows them that listening to God is a priority. Once they get the hang of it, expand this time to 10 then 15 then 20 minutes. As they grow older, you can introduce the concept of contemplative prayer, but it all starts with the foundation of sitting in silence.